Contact

Browsed through the contact list that I have on my phone.

Scrolling down.

And down. 

And down.

A**** **.

Stopped.

Stopped right there. 

Should I delete this one? When my presence is not even significant any more? At least to that person itself. 

Although he is the one I turn to when I need another opinion, or motivation. I know he'll always be there for me. But knowing how the effect of my presence to him  isn't symbiotic as his to me, I feel obliged to back off from his life. Because I don't feel the importance of my existence, when he is around me. I don't feel that I'm doing something to give back, that I'm always at the receiving end.

And for once, I want to stop receiving. I want to stop this madness of having to depend on him too much. 

Oh, Liyana, you're a complicated soul, you know that?